Values
Dignity-Centered Care
Every person deserves to be seen, heard, and honored in life and in death. I offer support that respects autonomy, affirms identity, and upholds the dignity of each individual’s path.
Grief as Lifelong
Grief isn’t linear or time-bound. I recognize its lifelong presence and offer support that makes space for sorrow, memory, transformation, and continued connection.
Care Without Conditions
Everyone is worthy of care—regardless of identity, beliefs, past choices, or how they grieve. I meet people where they are, offering nonjudgmental support through all stages of dying and mourning.
Presence Over Perfection
Being fully present is at the core of how I hold space. I offer grounded, compassionate companionship rather than quick solutions, trusting that care unfolds through relationship and attention.
My Areas of Expertise
My practice blends therapeutic tools, lived experience, and end-of-life care to support people navigating complex grief, identity, and transition. I work from a justice-informed, trauma-aware, and affirming lens—meeting clients with compassion, presence, and care. These are some of the areas where I offer the deepest support.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
I integrate ACT principles to help clients relate differently to pain, grief, and identity. Rather than trying to eliminate difficult thoughts or feelings, we work on building psychological flexibility—helping you stay connected to your values even in the midst of sorrow and uncertainty.
End-of-Life
Planning
I help individuals and families prepare for death with clarity, dignity, and intention. This might include advance directives, legacy projects, funeral/memorial wishes, or spiritual and emotional planning. Together, we shape an end-of-life journey that reflects your identity, values, and relationships.
Parent/Caregiver
Loss
Losing a parent or caregiver—especially early in life—reshapes how we grieve, relate, and live. I offer long-term, non-linear grief support rooted in the understanding that this kind of loss leaves echoes. My own experience of early loss informs how I hold space with tenderness and depth.
My Training
My work is grounded in a rich foundation of academic, contemplative, and community-based training in care, ethics, and support. I hold a PhD in Gender, Sexuality, and Women’s Studies from Western University, where my research focused on bioethics, public policy, care ethics, public health, and 2SLGBTQ+ healthcare systems. I also hold a Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology from Yorkville University, supporting my ability to integrate therapeutic approaches into grief and end-of-life care.
In 2025, I completed the Contemplative End of Life Care Certification through the Institute of Traditional Medicine—Canada’s first program of its kind. This training provides a unique blend of spiritual, emotional, and practical tools to support individuals and communities through death, dying, and grief. It draws on principles from hospice and palliative care, psychotherapy, social work, and somatic practice, preparing care workers to provide presence-based, relational support.
I also hold:
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An MA in Gender Studies from Queen’s University with a specialization in epidemiology and public health
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A BA in Women’s Studies and Gender Studies (Honours), with a major in Psychology and a minor in Human Rights and Sociology
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A Human Services Certificate from NBCC
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Advanced training in nonprofit leadership, trauma-informed practice, Indigenous health equity, and cultural safety.
Across all of my work, I integrate this education with lived experience, community care, and an unwavering belief in care that is affirming, adaptive, and rooted in justice.
My
Why
Understanding My Why
This work is rooted in personal experience. I lost my mother at a young age, and that early grief shaped how I understand care, absence, and the lifelong nature of loss. I know firsthand that grief doesn’t follow a timeline—and that it can change shape across years, relationships, and life stages. That knowing informs every part of my practice.
I offer end-of-life and grief support grounded in queer and trans care ethics, disability justice, and community-rooted values. My approach centers presence over perfection, deep listening over quick solutions, and care that adapts to who you are—not who systems expect you to be. Whether we’re planning together, sitting vigil, or sharing a moment of reflection, I hold space for the complexity, beauty, and sorrow of this work.
Get to
Know Me
Hi, I’m Dr. Jacob Barry (they/them), a trans non-binary counsellor, death doula, educator, and care worker based in Kingston, Ontario. My work is grounded in community, dignity, and a deep commitment to holding space through life’s most tender transitions. Whether supporting individuals at end-of-life, accompanying loved ones through grief, or helping folks document their legacy, I bring presence, warmth, and fierce care to every encounter. I believe that dying—like living—deserves intentionality, autonomy, and connection.
What We Do
A death and grief doula offers non-medical, holistic support before, during, and after death. Our role is to accompany individuals and their loved ones through the emotional, spiritual, and practical aspects of dying and grief. Whether sitting vigil, helping with advance care planning, or supporting rituals of remembrance, doulas hold space with compassion, presence, and respect.
WHAT IS A DEATH & GRIEF DOULA?
